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Don’t fret about getting old; just refuse to BE old

April 2, 2023

“Rain, rain, go away.”

No, wait!

“Rain, rain, stay and end the drought.”

No, wait!

What do I want?

It would be nice if we could control the weather to our preferences, but that’s not going to happen. The delightful thing is that we can control our thoughts about the weather. It may not always be easy, but taking charge of our thinking works for having a positive experience, even in the midst of a not-so-good day.

A student driving on the freeway in the rain got caught in traffic. She sent a text to her instructor: “I’ll be late. I’m stuck in traffic.” Unfortunately, the spell checker sent, “I’ll be late. I’m stuck in tragic.”

How many people get stuck in “tragic” as they age? How often do you hear someone say, “It’s terrible to get old?”

There’s even a name for being afraid of old age. It is called gerascophobia. What can you do about your age? Not much.

Like the weather, it’s not in our control, but we can refuse to be old. That doesn’t mean to deny our signs of aging but to wear them proudly. After all, we’ve made it through all of our worst storms so far. We can let go of the yearning to be younger and embrace all the wonderful things we can do and be now.

Sophia Bush wrote, “You are allowed to be both a masterpiece and a work in progress, simultaneously.”

So, what can we do to distract us from our “tragic aging” thoughts? Don’t hesitate to ask for help if we are having a bad day. It can be tough to put oneself in a vulnerable position, especially if we have always been able to do everything for ourselves.

In his book “The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse,” Charlie Mackesy wrote, “Asking for help isn’t giving up, said the horse. It’s refusing to give up.”

No matter our physical condition, we can continue to learn more and more about ourselves – especially if the spirit with which we approach each day is about getting to the heart of who we are and loving it.

Our lives can be about doing things wholeheartedly because we get to – this is our one unique chance to experience our particular life.

Louise Hay wrote, “You’ve been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself (and your age) and see what happens.”

Rain, rain, do what you want – you are not in charge of me.

The Rev. Linda McNamar is a Laguna Woods Village resident.

Orange County Register

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Don’t fret about getting old; just refuse to BE old

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